Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Randomize
