But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
It's not a walk of shame if you run
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Randomize
