Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
