please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
She's just so happy...and so naked.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
