His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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