His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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