New invention idea: vibrating tampons
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
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