Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I skipped work to stalk him.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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