shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
