Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
