he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Randomize
