is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
