3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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