before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
