Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize