i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
