would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
i just google imaged poop.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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