he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
