forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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