we have officially lost it.
i just wanna soil my oats bro
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
