I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
