i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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