some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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