My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
