How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
