Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
