i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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