We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
