I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
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