if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
