you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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