hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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