the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
