...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
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