He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize