I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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