he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize