I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
nutella sex= disaster
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
