I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Holy shit dude........stairs
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
