You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
