If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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