your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
