She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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