Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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