apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize