and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
