just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Randomize
