uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
