Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
