Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
this just has baby written all over it
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize
