p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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