You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
