Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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