My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
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