Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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